


Probable Cause

by Birdlad (Argothia)



Series: Family Time [3]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-20
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-06-13 08:31:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15360396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Argothia/pseuds/Birdlad
Summary: "What did you do?""Nothing, but you haven't seen us, okay?"





	Probable Cause

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so once upon a time I made a post on Tumblr and it sort of exploded into my most popular post I've ever made, which is pretty sad when you think about it.  
> Anyhow, I promised that if it cracked 200 notes I'd write a fic based on one of the scenarios in the post. As the post now has almost 400 notes I figure it's about time I posted this! So... enjoy.

Bruce only pauses in typing for a second when he feels the edge of his cape lift a bit. He knows immediately which of his children have taken up residence beneath the immense fabric. "What did you do?"

"Nothing," Tim's voice responds. "But you haven't seen us, okay?"

"Shh, secrecy," Cass agrees.

Bruce shakes his head and returns his focus to his work.

A moment later the elevator door opens and Dick starts walking very slowly down the stairs into the cave, scanning the entire room with his eyes several times while Bruce watches discretely. Finally, as Dick stops on the last step, his gaze rests on Bruce. "Have you seen Tim? Or Cass? Or Both?"

"No," Bruce answers, being certain to affect the perfect balance of clipped annoyance at being disturbed and taking a moment to think about it. Technically he's not lying. He hasn't actually seen either of them. "What have they done this time?"

Dick groans and tosses his hands up in exasperation. "I have no clue, but I know they did _something_! That's why I'm trying to find them before something explodes, dumps some kind of fluid on me, or -- or! -- angers some unholy abomination of space/time... and we both know that last one's the most likely scenario with those two."

"They do tend to be quite good at that." Bruce sighs, tiredly. "I haven't seen them."

Running a hand through his hair, Dick starts back up the stairs. "Right... well, if you do, let me know, okay?"

Bruce grunts, noncommittally, and waits until the elevator has started to rise carrying Dick back up to the manor, before he addresses the pair hiding under his cape. "Now will you tell me what you did?"

Tim pops up beside him and steals the cup of coffee off the desk while Cass comfortably leans against Bruce's shoulder. It's Tim who speaks for both of them, "We really didn't do anything."

"This time," Cass clarifies.

After nodding solemnly for a moment, Tim downs the last of Bruce's coffee. "We're just messing with him... Also did you hear how little faith he has in me? A space/time abomination is nothing. I can handle the board of directors on five minutes of sleep and one cup of coffee."

True enough. Bruce has actually watched him do that in the past. It was a thing of beauty. "Why are you messing with Dick?"

"He deserves it." Tim laughs like it's a joke, but there's an undercurrent of bitterness in his tone that makes Bruce grimace. "And somebody's gotta keep his life interesting, right?"

Cass is a little more obliging. "He switched Tim's coffee. 'Helping'."

Bruce pauses and looks up at Tim. "All this... because he tried to switch your coffee to decaf again?"

"You say that, but you know, deep down, that messing with a person's coffee is the ultimate sin," Tim responds, deadly serious.

Raising an eyebrow, Bruce indicates the empty mug that Tim had placed back on the desk.

Tim rolls his eyes. "That's different. That was an act of theft, which, I might add, you did nothing to prevent, so that's on you. We're talking blatant disregard for the laws of coffee here, Bruce! He tampered with my coffee! It's a violation!"

"If you say so," Bruce says, shaking his head. "Just... try not to torture him too much, alright?"

Shrugging, Tim starts heading for the lockers. "No promises. I'm gonna grab my keys. Cass, we're taking my car, let's go."  


When Tim is out of earshot, Bruce murmurs to Cass, "Don't let him go overboard with this."

"That's why I'm here," she answers, giving him a small hug before she hops off towards the cars.


End file.
